I am old as hell and still don't need glasses… drink right out of the bottle.
I am so old… I used to baby-sit Jesus.
I am so old… my social security number is 6.
I am so old… when I was in school they didn't teach history!
I am so old.... When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
I am in the prime of senility.
Middle age is when you go to bed at night and hope you feel better in the morning; old age is when you go to bed at night and hope you wake up in the morning.
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