You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren't.
Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater.
You burn your yard rather than mow it.
Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath.’
The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
You've ever raked leaves in your kitchen.
You were shooting pool when any of your kids were born.
You've ever hit a deer with your car...deliberately.
Your school fight song was "Dueling Banjos".
You've ever given rat traps as gifts.
You clean your fingernails with a stick.Your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
Every socket in your house breaks a fire code.
There are more than five McDonald's bags in your car.
There has ever been crime-scene tape on your bathroom door.
The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape.
You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.
Your kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."
The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when visiting your house.
You've ever bought a used cap.
RFe: Jeff Foxworthy
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