When It Comes to My Age?

I am old as hell and still don't need glasses… drink right out of the bottle.

I am so old… I used to baby-sit Jesus.

I am so old… my social security number is 6.

I am so old… when I was in school they didn't teach history!

I am so old.... When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

I am in the prime of senility.

     Benjamin Franklin

Middle age is when you go to bed at night and hope you feel better in the morning; old age is when you go to bed at night and hope you wake up in the morning.

     Groucho Marx