Sunday, January 3, 2010

George Carlin on New Year

Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Trout?

If you ever hope to be a credible adult and want a job that pay s better than minimum wage, then for God's sake don't pierce or tattoo every available piece of flesh. If so, then plan your future around saying, "Do you want fries with that?"

The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the butt heade. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf grande, half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread, cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one sweet-'n'-Low, and one NutraSweet," ooh, you're a huge horse’s ass.

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