George Carlin

George Denis Patrick Carlin was born in Manhattan, the second son of Mary Beary, a secretary, and Patrick Carlin, a national advertising manager for the New York Sun. Carlin was of Irish descent and was raised a Roman Catholic

some of his quotes:

Always do whatever's next.

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.

One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.

The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.