Friday, September 20, 2013

ONLY THE IRISH

  • Where were you going when I saw you coming back?
  • I ran after you, but when I caught up to you you'd gone.
  • 'How far is it to the next village?' asked the American tourist. 'It's about seven miles,' guessed the farmer. 'But it's only five if you run!'
  • 'I'm the unluckiest person in the whole world,' moaned Betty McGrath. 'I bought a non-stick pan and can't get the label off.'
  • 'I'd like some nails,' Mick requested of the travelling tinker. 'How long would you like them?' asked the man. 'Forever, if that's all right with you,' said Mick.
  • 'The baby is just like his father,' said Mary Quinn. 'But at least he's got his health!'
  • 'I was going to give him a nasty look but he already had one.
  • 'You three are a right pair if ever I saw one!'
  • 'Spread out in a bunch.'
  • ‘Pat and Murphy, saw sign saying "Tree fellers" wanted. Murphy said to Pat, If only Seamus had been with us we'd have got that job.'

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