"Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked.
"Well, I can think of one thing," the cowboy offered. "Once, on a trip to the Black Hills of South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers, who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker and smacked him in his face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. I then yelled, 'Now, back off, or I'll kick the carp out of all of you!'"
St. Peter was impressed. He leafed through the great book he held. "When did this happen?"
"Just a couple minutes ago. . . ."
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